WTF Weekend: Razor Wire Pubic Hair by Carlton Mellick III

A surreal sexual nightmare by cult bizarro author Carlton Mellick III. 

In a dark future where males have become extinct, humans are forced to breed with factory-manufactured living fuck-toys that possess an abundance of both male and female sex organs. One such creature is adopted by a warrior dominatrix named Celsia, who is trying to have a baby. But once she takes her new merchandise home, things don't quite go as planned. Wild tribes of rapists, women with multiple vaginas covering their bodies, sex tournaments, erotic mutilation, and a giant vagina possessing the secrets of the universe, this is one ugly perverted hell of a world. 

Told in Mellick's early schizophrenic prose style, Razor Wire Pubic Hair is like postmodern minimalistic art mixed with Japanese "guro" porn.


As you might suspect from the title, Razor Wire Pubic Hair is a weird-as-all-hell, seriously messed-up, jaw-droppingly nasty, almost impossibly imaginative, literary ejaculation. It's the kind of book that will make you cringe, shake your head, and truly wonder WTF is wrong with you that makes you want to turn another page.

Turning each page is like driving by a series of horrific accidents. You know you should avert your eyes, speed up, and get the hell off the highway
But you're wondering what's next.

Having said all that, I am neither a sadist nor a masochist, and carnage alone is rarely enough to keep me reading, but I really did enjoy this. Stylistically, the grammar and narrative format is a bit more experimental and avant-garde that I would normally have the patience for, but the plot and the characters are so weirdly compelling, I was compelled to read on.

The story is set in a futuristic dystopia where all the men have disappeared, all the women have become sadistic sex addicts, and self-aware hermaphroditic sex-dolls serve as both sexual partners and domestic slaves. I'll pause there for a moment and let all sink in. The somewhat unreliable narrator is actually one of those sex-dolls, purchased for the sole purpose of getting its mistress pregnant, and lamentably successful in fulfilling its role . . . leading to the creation of a monstrosity that's quickly left to hide itself in the shadows.

When not impregnating its mistress, the sex-doll is being abused and tattooed by its mistress' sister, a even more depraved woman. She's not just sadistically cruel - that hardly stands out in this world - but instead clearly, truly, completely, and unquestionably mad. We're talking bat shit bonkers here, full of conflicting emotions, and given to simultaneous moments of terrifying insanity . . . and even more terrifying clarity. She's not just a character, she's a window into this perverse world, and a commentary on the kind of people who inhabit it.

The plot meanders for a while, moving from one scene of sexual sadism to another, before finally settling into the rancid meat of the storyline. I'll pause here again while you wash your eyeballs and wring out your brain. If you're still with me, then you're in position to appreciate the slow, subtle, literary weaving that Carlton Mellick III has accomplished. Suddenly, all the little hints and throwaway moments of depravity begin to make sense, and we begin to see through the carnage. If a zombie invasion, dismemberment, cannibalism, and sexual destruction sound bizarre . . . well, that doesn't begin to scratch the surface.

Make no mistake, Razor Wire Pubic Hair is a weird, difficult, torturous journey through the Bizarro wastelands, but the gloriously disgusting climax is even more surreal than you can imagine, and pulls together all the plot threads and weird themes into a story that, despite its initial appearance, actually works rather well.

Paperback: 92 pages
Published: June 29, 2012
Published by: Eraserhead Press

The WTF Weekend gang is group of readers and reviewers who enjoy Weird, Taboo, and Forbidden fiction that is most definitely NSFW. Join us every Saturday and Sunday for more twisted tales . . . and if you have a review to contribute, please contact us!