Alex J. Cavanaugh, and which now has a permanent home at the IWSG site. Every first Wednesday of the month we gather to connect with one another, to share our thoughts and our insecurities, and to offer one another the kind of guidance and reassurance that only another author can provide.
We're a week late this month due to New Years falling on that first Wednesday, but I'm extremely excited to be co-hosting today along with River Fairchild, Julie Dao, and Sarah Foster!
I'm disappointed in myself this month, plain and simple.
December was supposed to be a big month for me. There were open-submission windows with a pair of mid-sized publishers that I quite like, and I really wanted to get my novel-in-progress edited and polished in time for submission. I've been told that, in its current state, the manuscript is something that a small press would love, and would snatch up in a minute, but I'm aiming for something bigger. I know what I need to work on - repetition, sentence structure, internal dialogue, and core conflict - and I really thought I could get it done, especially with 2 weeks off work.
I didn't. Not even close.
There are a lot of reasons why, and some of them are even really good reasons, but the bottom line is I didn't get it done, didn't make the deadlines, and ended up squandering the opportunity. That's not to say there won't be other opportunities, or that giving myself more time won't make for an even better finished piece of work, but missing this particular chance really gnaws at me.
Now, I could set myself another deadline, but I fear all that will do is set me up for failure once again. Instead, I am going to set myself a goal of picking up the manuscript once per day. Even if I know I won't have time to work on it, I need to pick it up once a day . . . hold it in my hands . . . feel its weight . . . remind myself that the words are my own . . . and own the responsibility for transforming the story.
That won't get it done, not by itself, but it will help to keep me on task.